Slipped Away
by Kyrie Star
Summary: Just a little something that was stuck in my head all October. DPOV. Rose falls pregnant and things happen. Not the usual 'rose falls pregnant' story.


**This is from Dimitri's POV, a little sad perhaps, but Rose falls pregnant and something happens. Adrian lovers, I wouldn't advise reading this. But if you do, then just know its only because he's the only moroi she dates in the book.**

**Slipped Away...**

_Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne_

It happened every year, around this time. She started losing interest in everything, food, fun, even me. I couldn't help her; only be there for her when she needed me and she couldn't help the way she was around this time of year. But I guess it was my fault after all. I mean, in a way it was.

Let me take you back to that year, five years ago, when she was still in school and I had inadvertently left, with the unhelpful hand of some strigoi. She had hunted me and killed me, or so she thought; and had decided to move on to Adrian. He would have been good to her, except for one thing. He didn't want responsibilities.

She didn't know any better and he was an idiot for telling her other wise. It happened after she thought I died, she said to me that she just wanted to feel loved and he gave that to her. But I don't blame her for wanting companionship. After I came back and Lissa helped her save me; I broke her heart and I'll never be able to forgive myself for that.

We were at court, she was staying in her room, Adrian at his parents' and me in mine. I wanted to talk to her, let her know that I didn't mean what I said but I wasn't the kind of man to take someone else's girlfriend. But every time I saw her, she looked worse than the last, and she never stayed long enough for me to talk to her. I tried running after her but she just didn't say anything; never said anything to what I had to say. Pretended she didn't hear me.

Then it started. I had heard around court that Adrian was cheating on her. Stupid arsehole. She would look around the room every time she walked in and once her eyes landed on mine, she'd go stiff and leave. Almost like she couldn't stand to see me... I hated myself. I could have helped her if I hadn't been so self absorbed, could've stopped what happened next. Could have saved her the heartache and pain that was to follow.

The rumours had started with something different that morning and soon I knew what everyone else knew; Rose was pregnant with Adrian's baby.

I couldn't handle it, even knowing she was hurting because he was indeed cheating on her. I ran away. Like the child she accused me of being, like the coward my mother never raised.

I was so stupid.

I thought only of myself, I didn't know that she had gone looking for me or that she had seen me run off. I didn't know she wanted me to come with her to tell him. I should have put her above my own needs, should have been there for her instead of bawling like a baby because she was pregnant with another man's child. But it had hurt me. Hurt so much that I had inadvertently made it happen.

There was a knock on my door at 3 the next morning and I stumbled out of bed, not bothering with a shirt, just the pyjama pants I had on. Opening the door, I had the shock of my life to see Rose, my sweet Roza, standing there. Blood running down her face, her left eye swollen shut and her right extremely bruised. She was holding her stomach and I noticed the bruises down her arms and on her chest.

I knew what had happened.

"Take me to Russia. Please. I can't stay here, Dimitri." she panted and I just nodded, I could see the tears forming in her eyes but she didn't let them fall. "Thank you, can I stay here while you sort things out? Please?"

"Sure."

Things turned around for her once we got to Baia, driving up the road to my mama's house I could see the excitement in her eyes, but still there was that shadow of fear from what Adrian had done. She smiled at me as we pulled in the drive way and I watched as the door opened to let out my babushka. I thought she would yell at either or perhaps both of us. But she surprised me by opening her arms and Roza leaned into her, tears running down her face.

"Come inside Dimka. Your mother needs some help in the kitchen." she said.

"Babushka..." I started.

"Roza will be fine with me. She needs to rest."

We stayed with my family for the last few months of her pregnancy, Lissa and Christian came over to see her with Eddie and Mia. I never saw her smile so much, she wasn't ready to care for the baby on her own so I said I would help her.

She had kissed me softly on the cheek and said "I don't want you to do anything you don't want but thank you for the offer. It means a lot to me that we're still friends after everything that's happened."

"I want to be there for you always, Roza. I still love you. I'm sorry about what I said, I didn't know how to deal with my emotions and having you there constantly was making them go haywire. So I said the first thing that came to mind. I'm so sorry. I'll do anything, be anything for you and this baby just to show you that you wont ever loose me again. I promise, honey."

"Took you long enough." Babushka said from the doorway as Roza's face lit up.

"I love you too, Comrade." she said softly. "Want to be a daddy?"

As the weeks passed, we got closer and she started to feel better about keeping the baby, a little girl we had been told. Roza asked me what I would like to name her, if she decided to keep her. I told her that I would love any name she had, so long as she picked it.

"Katrina Marie." she said with a soft smile.

"Beautiful." I replied.

That night she went into labour. I didn't know, we slept in different rooms. I woke up the next morning to babushka's hand on my shoulder, her eyes red and puffy. "She needs you now more than ever. She's at the hospital, she went into labour last night."

I drove way over the speed limit to get to the hospital, afraid of what I would find. I dreaded seeing people with broken bones, bleeding or bruised.

But what I found was worse.

Roza was curled up on her side in the bed they had given her, her body shaking as great big sobs erupted from her throat. She clutched at a pillow in front of her as if she would die if she didn't. A nurse walked in and saw me.

"Are you the father?" she asked quietly.

"Yes." I replied, I couldn't see any cot or any where for the baby to be. "Where is she? Where's our baby?"

"I'm so sorry. There was nothing we could do. She just stopped breathing." she replied, "I'm so sorry. We tried everything we could. She just couldn't breathe."

My heart stopped in my chest, my mind replaying the last words me and Roza said last night.

"_I think, I love her."_

"_I know you do. I've seen you put your hand on your belly and smile. I've heard you talk to her, saying that mummy and daddy would look after her." I replied._

"_Well, I love her. I can't wait for her to get here. We'll have our own little family." she smiled at me and I couldn't help but grin back, "We'll have her and she'll have us."_

"_Always."_

The doctor was telling me how and why it had happened but I was still lost in my memories.

"Dimitri?" she pulled me from my thoughts. Her voice was hoarse, her eyes blood shot and puffy, and there was snot on her face as I walked over. "She's gone! I couldn't help her!" her tears started again as she reached for me. I pulled her into my arms, but couldn't think past the words in my head.

_She's gone!_

We had both loved the little girl in her tummy. A little girl who never got a chance in this world because her biological father took it away from her before she was even born.

_She's gone!_

I couldn't breathe, but it had to be worse for Roza, my sweet Roza.

"I held her in my arms and she smiled at me and then I went outside to get some fresh air and when I came back. She was gone!" she sobbed into my chest and I felt the wetness of her tears.

_She's gone!_

Roza hadn't cried to me when Adrian had beat her, hadn't cried about her mother disowning her for falling pregnant and leaving, hadn't cried when Lissa had told her she wasn't allowed to come back, hadn't cried when her father was arrested. But now, she sobbed so loud, I couldn't hear my heartbeat. I held her tighter against my chest.

_She's gone!_

I couldn't find the words to comfort her, couldn't find any words at all. I was in shock the nurse was watching us. Roza was sobbing but strangely all I could feel was a slow burning rage building in my chest.

_She's gone!_

That may be true, but Adrian was still here, still walking this earth. He should be feeling the way Roza is right now.

_This is his fault! Hurt him, make him pay. He's no better than your father!_

Roza looked up, "Say something, please!"

"I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. You just rest okay? I'll be right here."

She blinked as more tears formed and leaned into me, crying again. But as time passed she fell asleep. My phone was in my hand a moment later.

"Eddie. Roza had the baby."

"How are they? You sound like shit, man."

"The baby died. Roza is... She can't... I've never seen her like this Eddie. Not after Mason died, not ever." I could hear how blank my voice sounded, "The doctor said it was due to some trauma that she sustained before she was born."

"So what you're saying is that Adrian caused this, when he hit Rose." his voice was numb there was no other word for it. It was like with my words I had sucked all the emotion out of him. "No, Mia. When Adrian hit Rose, he killed the baby."

_She's gone! Hurt him, he's no better than your father!_

"Yes. That is what I'm saying."

"Abe just got out for hitting that little cunt. Do you want me to call him?"

"No. I'll do it myself while Roza is asleep."

"Okay." he replied.

We hung up and soon I was calling the most dangerous man I knew.

_She's gone! Hurt him, he's no better than your father!_

"Mazur."

"Abe, it's Dimitri."

"What's happened?"

I recounted what I knew. "She was going to name her Katrina Marie."

"He's as good as dead. But I'll make him suffer first."

"Bring him to me."

"No. I can't do that." he said, "I don't want you catching the fall out from what's going to happen."

"Ibrahim."

"The answer will always be no." he sighed, "I'm sorry Dimitri, but Rose will need you to keep her safe while she recovers. That is the end of this conversation."

He hung up on me and I looked down at my sweet Roza. She had tears on her eyelashes still and sobbed occasionally in her sleep.

_She's gone! Hurt him, he's no better than your father!_

That was five years ago. Now whenever October comes around, I stand beside her at the lookout over the beach and hold her tight as she sobs for Kit, saying that she's sorry. That if she could change anything, she wouldn't tell Adrian about her. And when the day is almost over and we've said our good-byes again, we go to Lissa and Christian's and pick up our little boy and girl and head back home. Our boy will be four next March and our girl is still just a baby.

We still see Adrian around, and Roza's dad.

Adrian doesn't look as good as he used to, he had a run in with a group of 'strigoi' who had taken great pleasure in carving his pale flesh and causing him all sorts of pain. Of course when ever Roza sees him I feel her stiffen beside me and her urge to walk in the other direction.

And I'm thankful to Abe. He found us a IVF doctor who was trialling some new fertility drug and well; we have two beautiful babies to show for it. But we both miss Katrina. We both wish she was still here and every time I think of her, I wish her happiness in her next life.

On both nights every year, I hold my Roza close to my chest as she cries and my heart breaks every time for that little girl that never had a chance and the reluctant mother who grew to love her so much that she cried for almost three months after her death. I know that Rose will be okay, in time. That she'll be able to look back and smile when she thinks about her little girl; and the too short time she had spent with her. But until then, she'll always have me and I'll be there,

_Always..._

**Sorry about how sad this one is, but I needed to get it out. October always does this to me.**

**- Kyrie**


End file.
